Letters #16 - Guthix Dispels Rumours

Guthix Dispels Rumours

GUTHIX, PERHAPS THE MOST ENIGMATIC AND MISUNDERSTOOD DEITY OF Q-PEA, RETURNS ONCE AGAIN TO DISPEL SOME OF THE MORE COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS AND RUMOURS, ANSWER A FEW QUERIES, AND PERHAPS EVEN REVEAL SOME SECRETS OF THE HISTORY OF Q-PEA...

I hath been roused from mine slumber once more by the clamouring for knowledge of the subjects of mine world, and as such feel duty bound to respond to some of these queries.

Oh sideless one,
I hear every rumour in Lumbridge, and lately they all tell of the Deepening. Please sort the lies from the truth for me. Gee, of Lumbridge

Rumour 1: after the Deepening, travellers will ride camels from town to town.

Rumour 2: every traveller will get a house to keep their things in.

Rumour 3: the world will only get the new look of the Deepening, and none of the other wonders.
Rumour 4: fighters will be able to choose how they wield their weapons and shields.

Rumours are the refuge of the braggard, and the scoundrel. Put not thy faith in rumour, for often they shall deceive intentionally, and the rare occasion that they doth find the grain of truth ist not worthy of counting. I can tell thee true however, the first three rumours that thou mention are falsehoods, and the fourth, if I understand thy meaning correctly, ist already in effect upon this plane...

To Whichever god Happens to be Answering Prayers:

Why does Guthix exist? My studies show that a god without followers fades away. Yet the gods of Q-pea seem to exist whatever mortals believe. Is it something about Q-pea itself, or about the gods? I would put it in my machine if I could.

Professor Oddenstein, of Draynor Manor

Thy assumption is mostly correct noble philosopher; most gods mayst not stay long on a plane where their existence ist not demanded by followers.
Just speaking the name of a god canst give them power enough to enter this plane, and with followers then they mayst remain.

I am not most gods however; mine power is drawn from the land, from the seas, from the plants and trees, from the very essences of life that dwell here. This is why I neither seek nor demand loyalty from mine followers, for my power is not that of belief, but of life.
The only thing that couldst disrupt mine energies wouldst be the extinction of all life upon this realm, in which case I wouldst be forced from this realm to find another. I would never allow such an abomination against balance to occur here.

Dear Guthix,

I am one of the few in the world who dread the Deepening. I am a gnome, and I see the world through gnomish eyes and speak in gnomish words. I fear the new world will be made only for the bulky eyes and clumsy tongues of men. Will gnomes be barred from it because we see things more clearly?

Hazelmere, of the gnome island east of Yanille

I hath good news for thee, for the renewed world is written in a tongue of its own, understood by every race, no matter what its native language may be.
Thus it is that a gnome may speak happily with a man, and see the same world, despite each being born knowing a different language. It is a universal language for all; this is one of its major strengths.

Could the Library give a room to paintings, called the gallery of the faithful?
Many of my customers buy paint and canvas from me to paint the world, and they would like others to see what they have done.

Your admirer, Rommik, of Rommik's Crafty Supplies, Rimmington

All gods are followers of the aesthetic virtues, and as such we will be honoured to receive artwork of talent. Thou mayst send thy work to the usual address...
The chances of its publication in our letters responses is purely dependent upon our appreciation of its' quality of course...

Oh mighty gods of Q-pea,
I have slept in every alley of Varrock, and I have only ever met humans there. Are there any other races in Q-pea? It would be nice to meet elves, dwarves, or even goblins. Also, is the whole land called Q-pea, or what?

Ever neutral,
Charlie the Tramp, of the Varrock alleys

This realms name is in truth Gielinor, yet is called Q-pea in the common tongue by it's inhabitants. Each kingdom hath its' own name such as Misthalin, Asgarnia, and so forth.
I also feel obliged to point out that the races thou hast mentioned are all currently in residence upon this realm, along with many more lesser known species such as the Skavid...

Oh imortal lord of neutralness,

Why may a traveller choose their looks only on the day they arrive? I am tired of my hair. Could you, mighty lord, put a place in the world where a person can change their hair, clothes, skin and body? Please?

Your humble devotee

Ellamaria, of the Varrock palace gardens

There is a mage who hath dedicated his life to the study of the morphogenic field which makes up thy physical form, and on magicks to allow him to alter it, for a small fee.

I believe he is more commonly referred to as the 'makeover mage', and a visit to him, along with the required fee, shall reap the dividends which thou seek.

Is this a trick? Either Guthix and Zamorak are two different gods, or they are the same one. I have two reasons that prove they are the same.

1. They both write in the same odd way.
2. Neither of them can spell, so it could really be one god misspelling. How old are you? Any child in Varrock can spell "wouldn't". You, Guthix, spell it "wouldst".

My advise to you is to learn to spell, or the Black Arm Gang will worship something else. A god who went to school would be nice to worship. So come on, learn to spell.

Grubor, of the Black Arm Gang

My advice to thee wouldst be to be certain of thine own spelling before scurrilously and slanderously attacking the errors of another.
Especially given that such errors do not in fact exist.
Indeed, pedanticism is only effective when thou art correct.

Hi great guthix,
I teach the monks of Ardougne about the gods, and they ask whether there are more gods than you, Saradomin and Zamorak. If there are, who are they, and what do they stand for? Also, will the Library ever hold the history of Q-pea?
your follower,
Brother Omad, of the Ardougne monastery

There are at least twenty deities who didst force themselves upon this realm whilst I slumbered, Saradomin and Zamorak are the two who hath most prominence amongst the general populace.

As to thy query regarding the histories of the library, I hath knowledge that such an addition is indeed planned, but treacherous Zamorak takes strange delight in the torture of the man responsible, Reldo.
This puzzles me greatly, for he hath never struck me as anything more than a mild mannered creature devoted solely to the studies of scholarship.

Tell me. You claim to be the god of balance, of neutrality. And your name is Guthix. But from the moment you have a name, you are no longer neutral. In the last letters you told Duke Horacio: "I am beyond good or evil, I am simply Guthix." That means you chose the name, or like it. So you are not neutral, because you favour something.

Perhaps I am wrong, for I am no god, only a knight, and not wise enough to understand.
Forgive me for that
Follower of the almighty Saradomin, Sir Vyvin, of the White Knights' castle, Falador

A name means nothing other than the meaning that ist placed upon it.
Mine name means nothing in of itself; it is simply the closest thing to my true name that ist possible in the language of man.
To pronounce mine true name correctly I wouldst have to remove thy vocal cords.

Oh mighty ones in the sky,
I have been wondering several things, in between other things I have forgotten.
How many letters does each of you get every day?
Would all three of you ever write one letter together?
And finally, if I may ask... how do you feel about clowns? One keeps appearing in my thingummywut.

A follower of the gods,
Wizard Traiborn, of the Wizards' Tower

Each god receives questions in the magnitude of hundreds daily, and usually more directly following the publication of their responses.
Although many are received and all are read, only a few are selected for response - thou will probably be glad to know, for thou art known to us as a quizzical thinker, Wizard Traiborn, and although thy many questions are not necessarily answered, they all reach their destination.

As to thy query regarding the co-operation of Saradomin and Zamorak with myself upon a letters response, I fear that making the two arch-enemies co-operate upon anything, even something as minor as responding to their followers, is a task beyond even my powers...
...and I personally find clowns to be unfunny bufoons who willst degrade their lives for an attempt at a cheap laugh; but I am not known for my sense of humour.

Dear Guthix,
When you renew Q-pea, will every place be different? Will my charts still be right? It would take sailors a long time to learn a completely new world. Many would give up the sea, and Port Sarim would stand empty for a long time.

Your follower,

Captain Tobias, of Port Sarim

The world shall remain the same, yet will also be changed. Continents, seas, rivers, mountains and cities shall remain similar to their existing selves, yet shall be different enough to briefly disorient those who rely on existing landmarks for direction.
I hath already claimed the restoration of this world will be total, from each blade of grass, to the highest mountain - and my claim was not made with exaggeration.

Guthix,

Truly you are a mighty god, but I am confused. In his first letters, Saradomin said that HE created Q-pea. In your first letter, at last a word from the third god, you said YOU did. Who is puffing himself up, and who is lying? I have served Saradomin all my life, but now I doubt my ways. Should I follow you, or Zamorak, or stay as I am? Or follow no god at all? Is that the way of Guthix? And how would I know if YOU were the one puffing himself up? My head hurts now.

Brother Jered, of the Edgeville monastery

I claim not the creation of Gielinor; I claim it's rightful ownership, for none other dwelled here when first I arrived.
I knowst not why Saradomin would claim otherwise, other than in a bid for glory, for all other gods came to this plane whilst I slumbered.

Greeting o' wise and powerful Guthix,

I would ask thee about the dwarves and their mine. The dwarven smiths are the greatest in all Q-pea, and their skill is matched only by their love of being alone. So where is their furnace? Surely they do not carry their ore all the way to Falador to smelt it, and trek back to hammer it. If they did, I would see them, for my chain shop is right there. Could they be persuaded to share a furnace with us smiths of the surface, if we did them a favour?

A bewildered smith,
Wayne, of Wayne's Chains, Falador

Dwarves learn the magick known as 'superheat item' at a young age, for it removes the uncertainty involved with smelting ores in the more conventional manner, and doth improve their productivity.

As such they hath no need for furnaces.

Dear Guthix,
I am barred from the market for shouting my wares. But I did not shout anything. My brother Wilough put on my cap and shouted in my name, and now I am the one barred. I told the Council's gnomes, but they did not listen. What should I do? My brother played a little prank, and now I am in tears. Please help me, mighty one.

Shilop, a child of Varrock

I wouldst advise thee to take heed of the council's warnings about letting another walk in thy name.
They are placed prominently for a reason, and to ignore them is to gamble with thy life in Q-pea. Hide thy cap from thy brother.

dear holy and unholy one,

Two quick questions.
1) In the interest of balance, do you do everything, or nothing?
2) Is your name said guh-thicks or goo-thicks? The young druids argue about it at every ritual. Or should we accept both, in the interest of balance?

Thank you,
Pikkupstix, druid of Taverley

I do anything and everything necessary to maintain balance - it is a far more time consuming occupation than might first be considered.

As to thy second question, my true name is not pronouncable by human form, yet it's closest approximation in the language of man is 'guh-thicks'.

Guthix, I sell herbs to the druids of the circle, and they clearly follow you and your way of balance, if it is a way at all.
But what about Chaos Druids in the dungeon beneath my town? The Bestiary says they follow both you and Zamorak, and I cannot see how. Neutral, but not neutral? Evil, but not evil? What are your thoughts?

Jatix, of the herb shop in Taverley

The chaos druids acknowledge mine position as the eldest and most powerful deity, and still strive for my ultimate aim of balance upon this land; but unlike the more passive actions taken by their non-chaotic brethren, they take an active role in culling this land of the more prolific species which inhabit it.

Man is the most prolific race that dwelleth upon this realm, and it is mankind that they take most pleasure in dispatching.
This is also an aim of Zamoraks, and so they doth serve two masters through striving for this one goal.

Dear Guthix,

How can you bear not to choose between good and evil? Isn't it dull, being neutral all the time? It is like a stew with no salt. Do Zamorak and Saradomin ever get angry that you support neither of them? (Not that Saradomin would get angry with anybody.) I just do not see how you can take it.

Just wondering,

The Cook, of Lumbridge castle

P.S. Must you talk so strangely? I can barely understand you.

I am balance, not neutrality - neutrality doth suggest inaction, when the oposite is the truth. I willst take ANY action necessary to ensure balance upon mine plane, and as such, mine actions canst be deemed to be good or evil depending on howst they affect thee. In truth, they are neither - they art merely necessary.

As to the 'weirdness' of mine language: the language of man is not native to myself, and hast changed greatly since last I had use for it.
I canst not express myself clearer than this, for thine language is both alien and strange to me.

Almighty gods... I have trained the guards of Varrock for years and fought every monster I have met. My blows have struck from nothing to twenty-nine, yet I have never truly missed. When I fail, I strike for nothing instead. How can I be so accurate that I never miss? It vexes me... though I quite like not missing... it is quite unrealistic...
I hope the Deepening changes this...

Follower of all gods....

Sir Prysin, of Varrock palace

I beg to differ with thy experience in combat.
Often do I see skilled warriors attack each other, yet hit at a bad angle and provide merely a glancing blow that causes no damage, or have their attack slighted due to armour: rarely do I see a warrior with any weapons training utterly miss an opponent at close range...

Dear Allmighty Guthix,

I guard the way to the lost city of Zanaris, so I see what comes back out. Why do the strange walking clothes in the city drop bones when they are killed? Isn't it strange that a magical creature with no bones leaves bones behind? I am sure your great knowledge holds a perfectly good explanation.

From Shamus, of the Lumbridge woods (a very confused leprechaun)

The beings that thou speak of are not wholly tied to this realm; they flitter between the dimensions like butterflies across a meadow. When thou slay them, thou force their remains into one dimension alone; this one.

As long as they are alive they canst remain incorporeal, but once their fate hast been decided and they hath died they canst no longer travel between realms as they could when they were alive.

Hi Guthy. Why have you got wires sticking out of your skull? Oh yeah, and why does the gypsy want you to help me kill Delrith? I can do it by myself, because I can kill a deadly red spider, and it is stronger than Delrith. So don't help me.

Hope you can control Zamorak. Bye. Wilough, of Varrock

They art tendrils, not 'wires' - and I require them.
As to your boasts of your battle prowess being great enough to defeat the terrible Delrith without mine assistance, I say to you: drop thy Silverlight, for it is a sword endowed with power by myself.

Then perhaps thou willst see the assistance which hath been offered to thee.

I hath just enough time to answer a few quick questions, for maintaining the balance of this world is a time-consuming job.

Aubury, of Aubury's Rune Shop, asks "Why are the magic runes used only once per rune?" - Each rune is a man made stone which hath been endowed with a magical charge, yet just enough charge for one use only.

Gypsy Aris says that "the Council has too much imagination" to which I respond: 'Tis better to have a surplus than a deficit is it not?

Harry, of the fishing shop in Catherby, enquires "After the Deepening, will my customers be able to hold their fishing gear, such as fishing rods?" - I can assure thee that such is indeed the case.

The Lumbridge Guide asks "Where do the newcomers come in from?";
From the light over Lumbridge. Whence the light comes, I shall not say.

Iffie, of the clothes shop in Varrock, would like to know whether or not "the rumour is true that masks raise your levels by 10, depending on their colour?" - my response is that this is a baseless rumour.
One of far too many, unfortunately.

Hickton, of Hickton's Archery Emporium, would like to know "Will monsters be able to cast spells or shoot back at my archers?"
Most assuredly... it is a necessary balance to counter that they may now be swarmed by a mob...

And so my time draws to a close. Until such time as I impart my wisdom once again,

Balance Is Power-

Guthix

DISCLAIMER: The views of Guthix do not reflect the views of DoubleU. DoubleU tried to stop him giving away its secrets, but he is a god. If you would like to contact him however...